Smiles – September 21, 2020

Daily Dose Smiles

All jokes submitted by our insane membership joke team.

My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb.

When one door closes and another door opens, you are, probably, in prison.

I had my patience tested. I’m negative.

From the Good Old Days
on TV

Vibrations, Exaltations, and Knowledge
Take a listen

He is Always Funny

A Wonderful Quiz
Einstein sits next to a man on a long flight.
Einstein says, “Let’s play a game. I will ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you will pay me only $5; but if I don’t’ know the answer, I will pay you $500”.
The man agrees and the game proceeds.
Einstein asks the first question, “What is the distance between the Earth and the Moon?” 
The man doesn’t way a word. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out $5.
He then asks Einstein, “What goes up a hill with 3 legs, but comes down on 4?”
Einstein thinks about it for a long time but fails to answer the question.
After almost an hour, he gives the man $500.
An irritated Einstein then asks, “well, so what goes up a hill on 3 legs and comes down on 4?”
The man reaches into his pocket and gives Einstein $5.
 Four One-Liners Explained
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
He’s all right now.
Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring.
The doctor says I”m OK, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
Thanks for explaining the word “galore” to me, it means a lot.